With this...
And this...
And some of this, too...
Oh, and I almost forgot this...
It's been busy, to say the least. And on top of that, she's starting to teeth. So my sweet little happy baby has turned into a crankasaurus. It has been a little umm... shall we say difficult around here lately?
But to be honest... it is something more, too. I've been in a funk lately, too. Questioning a lot of stuff - like my purpose outside of motherhood. The "reason" for the life path we've taken and some of the experiences we've had and the effect they've had on us. What my identity is and why I feel so restless/lost sometimes. (On some days it seems like diaper-changer would be an adequate title.)
And the strange thing is... all of these feelings (though I know they are pretty normal) end up making me feel crazy-guilty because just look at the gift I've been given! Why can't I just be content?
No answers really... just questions.
5 comments:
I'm sure it's been tough Carrie, since coming home from China. Going from working at an amazing organization making a difference in the lives of so many orphans to being a stay at home mom which is an AWESOME job and ministry, just different from what you did for the past 3 1/2 years. You are in my thoughts and prayers!
Blessings,
Anneli
Oh Carrie,
I've been in a very similar funk for the past two weeks. I know that God is quietly whispering to our family, but I can't quite make out the call.
And so for today I continue to do the best I can to raise four young disciples to love Him, but still I strain to hear His whisper over the noise...
I'll be praying for you as you make your way out of the mire of a funk!
Blessings,
Kristi
OH ... I get it! This repatriation stuff is simply NOT easy! Trusting He will lead you out of your funk (and mine too)!
Love & Blessings,
Kim
Motherhood is such a strange mix of joy, boredom, frustration and a sense that you are doing the most important job there is. To encourage you--I think that the time when kids start moving and making messes until the time they actually start talking and being people you can interact with (maybe 2 to 2 1/2) is sort of the hardest time. Nothing stays in place in the house and they get bored quickly. The best part--things get better each year. I jsut had a talk with my high schooler Maggie--you remember when she was 3 or 4. Now she is almost an adult with dreams, decisions and hearing God's voice. Hang in there--motherhood brings out the "us" inside and sometimes that isn't our favorite part! Virginia
I needed this tonight. Thanks.
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